Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Overheard outside a single-seater gas station bathroom in Springfield, Mass

"You got to let me in! This broad out here (she's referring to yours truly, gentle readers) doesn't know I'm with you."

"I can't! Veronica's taking a sh*t, and I'm turtling!"

Thursday, January 14, 2010

I'm waiting for my car to be serviced. I handed the keys to the mechanic with a look that said, "I will not be judged. I keep a litter box in my car. And dill pickle-flavored sunflower seeds. These things are not for me, but they could be, and I refuse to suffer your reproach." In forty-five minutes I will write him a larger check than I would like and then turn on my heel, regally. I will appear taller than my 5'2''.

I wish I had so much more than my little monies to send to Haiti. I wish I had magical powers. I wish people weren't such fragile things.

Saturday, January 9, 2010

off to an impressive start

It's a bad sign when I'd rather illustrate my state of mind with pictures of my cat than expend energy on analyzing my malaise. But here we are.

I've been feeling like this:

Or maybe like this:

I blame the 3700 or so miles we drove over the holidays. I went a little funny somewhere in Ohio. But I miss you. And I'll be back.