Friday, July 31, 2009


I've never had a very green thumb (it's a brackish color at best), so if a plant wants to survive in my house, then the force must be strong with it. Recently, though, I've had a surprising bit of success with two Christmas cacti, one of which bloomed enthusiastically for six months. I also have a jade plant that has grown to fairly impressive proportions, particularly when you consider that it was just a leaf with some roots when I got it. (Note: some would insist that I'm supposed to "shape" the jade, weighting the branches with stones and the like, but I'm just not sure that I can impose my will on it more than I already have.)

Anyhoo, those triumphs under my belt, I decided that it was time to enter the world of slightly flossier succulents. So we bought this:

Lovely, no? But then it started this shit:

What the f*ck? I don't overwater. I keep it in the kitchen, mostly, but I move it to the bar on sunny days, because I figure it might like to catch some rays and have a cocktail. But does it appreciate my care and thoughtfulness? No. It decides to make cactus raisins, which, as far as I can tell, ain't good for sh*t. Look at all the denuded spots:

It's shameful. The others seem to be doing well, which makes me wonder if the snoots at the plant shop did me less than a solid:

So, I'm at a loss. Any suggestions? Bottom line: I don't truck with pansy-ass plants, so if it wants to stick around it best buck up.

In other news, it is finished:
Now I'm off to start on the cantaloupe and peaches, and if you've read The Grapes of Wrath, you know where that will lead. But what the hell - fall comes too soon, so you've got to get your local fruity kicks while the getting is good.


megan said...

It's not getting enough light. Succulents need obscene amounts of light or they will get that succulent leprosy. Is that top pic current, or did you take it when you first got the plant? Because I could already tell from the flatness of the little guy in the top pic that it was sick.

Oh, and don't feel bad. I am horrific with plants, and I'm a damn florist. In fact, maybe I will write about this today. I was planning on writing a post about how I'm an anglophile. This is better.

mieletcannelle said...

The same thing happened to mine.. my thumb is decidedly a midnight shade of death. Though my jade plant initially did ok, the only thing that can deal are the hens and chicks that don't ever actualy appear to need water or love. best of luck!

enhabiten said...

i have that same plant and the little nubbin thingies are falling off mine too. light you say megan? ima gonna try that. thanks.

keri said...

What a needy plant. Sheesh. This plant just turned in to a welcome home gift for a friend whose house has more direct light.

Here's to anglophilia and chickens.