About once a month, we're awakened by the amorous activities of our upstairs neighbors. I haven't met them, but judging from their thunderous love, I imagine that she delivers refrigerators without a dolly and he mixes cement with his penis for a living. You know how in Jurassic park people can tell when the T-Rex is approaching because the water in their glasses starts to quiver? Well, that's how we know they're getting down to business time. Then the whole building starts to tremble, and we're transfixed by our undulating ceiling for the next 27 minutes. I don't know where they found a giant, squeaking, spring-loaded metal bed frame, but they did, and I guarantee that they have knocked its traumatized headboard through the plaster and driven its quaking legs at least half an inch into the hardwood. Good for them.
In other news, we had a little bit of wine and a litte bit of rye this evening. Yaymen.
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4 comments:
I would comment, but I can't stop laughing...
Oh you poor dear. My ex-next-door neighbors were similar, but he was a very short, petite, slender black man, and she was a tall obese blonde white trash girl. She'd come home from her nightshifts very late and ready for lovin' and they'd go at it for over an hour at a time....
When fucked, excuse me, made love, she sounded like a pig getting skinned alive in a vat of acid. Sooooo disturbing and I still think of it sometimes over a year later.
Thankfully, I now live next to an angry, homely girl who never gets laid. It's awesome.
never read something like this while drinking from a straw....laughing while squirting beverage from your nose all over your computer screen is a mixed bag at best...
and my confirmation word is...oralik...I may die
The best is when you've just had a fight with your mister and you're lying in bed fuming while listening to your neighbors play Hide the Salami at top volume. That's when you start throwing shoes.
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